Completely edible googly eyed flying spaghetti monster.  This person is so clever!

And tell me you don’t want to eat this!

Someone said the other day “Are you really seriously not having your dad at your wedding?”

My answer? “Not only yes, but HELL YES. How would you like a minion of Satan insisting that he and he alone has the right to walk you down the isle?”

Not only that, I’d rather have my sisters there and where David/Satan Minion is they won’t be.

My Dad’s side of the family is seriously in league with the Devil and they hate me anyway, so I don’t feel bad anymore hating them back.  I have never felt like my Aunt Delpha liked me, ever and I was certainly fooled by Lisa.  Of course, she thinks I’m a: “slut”, a “Liar, and that: “you are not good enough for Brian” and “Don’t you dare hurt him”.

It’s pretty sad that an entire genetic branch of my family is so fucked up I can’t have anything to do with them.

Funny that we are so happy, Brian and I, eh?    And in case anyone was wondering, I’m walking down the isle by myself.  I love my stepdad more than anything, but at 29 I think it more appropriate I stand on my own.

I’m thinking of starting a wedding blog- so that I can post all the details without boring anyone here and share that blog with family.  I don’t want family (unless already invited) here   I’m sure I’ve got a couple of lurkers who read and then are outraged, but I’m cool with that.

Engagement ring? YES!

Groom? Yup!

Date? 7/17/2009

Venue? YES! LOOK AT THIS! (It comes with a security guard so I can keep my creepy asshole father out!  Seriously.)

Dress?  Yes!

Sister to lace up dress?  Yes!  Did you see the back of the dress?

And that’s pretty much it….  I HAVE SO MUCH STUFF LEFT TO FIGURE OUT!

Not panicking.

Much.

Me “Its cold and foggy and I can hardly see anything it’s so mucky this morning!   I feel like I’m in the suburbs of hell!”

Sister “You mean hell if it was cold and wet and not hot and dry?  The other hell?”

Me “Exactly!”

It’s nice that I don’t have to make sense and my family still loves me. That’s all I’m saying.

Have you heard of Scentsy?  Scentsy smells oh so good.  At work we were looking at a catalog and one of the scents is “Skinny Dippin”.

Hmm, we wonder, what exactly does skinny dippin smell like?  (“Fresh green apples perfectly harmonized with refreshing melons and juicy pears.” hmm. Who knew?)

I’m peering over someone’s shoulder and the next thing I read is “Sunkissed Coitus” and I about died.   I grab the catalog and I read it again, and it really says “Sunkissed CITRUS”.  And then everyone wants to know what the big deal is with that particular page that I’m red.  So then I have to tell them. They all think it’s very funny.  I was just curious as to what “sunkissed coitus” would smell like, you know? Cause skinny dippin smells like apples?

My life? It is hard. I have to buy a new phone. (I mean I REALLY have to buy a new phone)

Mine has no external sound.  (I maybe dropped it a couple of times)

I’m eligible from the lovely AT&T for an upgrade but the free ones…. are ugly.  So I’ve decided I will just go ahead, in the next couple of weeks, and get something I really want.

So, I like this one

But I also really like THIS ONE

Cute pink phone? Cute green phone?  which one will I choose?

I ordered her. My dress.

She is lovely.

YEAH!

I don’t feel like working.  I am working, cause 850 w-2′s don’t just print and stuff themeselves but I don’t FEEL like it.  So there.

In addition to being happier than I think I’ve ever been, I’m also incredibly stressed.

January is a shitty shitty month to be handling a court case in addition to doing quarterlies and issuing W-2′s to 50+ companies.

I had pre- trial yesterday and I thought the whole thing would get dismissed, but no, I just signed the paperwork.  Which sucks. I still have to prepare for trial (and that means pay)  EVEN THOUGH it will almost certainly be dismissed. Its tough.  Just tough, because I thought I was going to be done.  So thinking I was going to be done yesterday and having it not was a blow. I’ve been dealing with this since June.  I’m so so tired.  (It could be worse, I’ll stop whining )  And I know I have 13.5 years left. Believe me.  I know.

Someone who doesn’t know the back story asked me why I hated the ex so much.  And “kids need dads too.”  I didn’t smack her.

I’ve been going home, cooking dinner, and reading.  Just… zoning out.  I have tons of things to talk about and just no energy.

Oh, and the external hard drive failed on my computer at work. Which means duplicating 20 complex spreadsheets.  I’ll know on Thursday if the drive can be saved, or at least the information can be pulled off.  I’m praying for that to happen, because I don’t need anymore work this month