It tastes like vinegar and dishwater, kind of.  Ridiculously expensive so I’m making myself drink it.

Things that make me go hmmm.

I would like nothing better than to announce today that I am pregnant.

Cause you know, it’s APRIL FIRST.  It would be kind of funny, you all sitting there, trying to figure out if I was joking or not.

Except I’m not pregnant. And I can’t really joke around about that.

I begged Brian all last month to just LET ME BE DONE WITH BIRTH CONTROL ALREADY! I mean honestly, what’s 28 extra days?  Apparently those 28 extra days meant something to him, so we (ha ha we, like he had something to do with that? ha ha? ) stuck with the stupid hormones until last Friday. Which means short of a miracle there is no way I could be knocked up today.  Damn him and his odd sensibilities.

So instead, here is this:

Internets, I’m DONE with birth control for the time being. Yes. We are trying to spawn.  I’ll spare you any unnecessary details but if I can’t share my hopes here, WHERE CAN I???

I got pregnant with Emma the first month I tried, but I was 23.  I’m 30 now- and that means I’ve lost 90% of the eggs I had!  We shall see how this works for us.

I know you might think I’m a bit crazy to start school and have a wee one all in the same year but I came to the realization that there will never be a good time, never a not busy time and if I wanted to go to school NOW was the time.  And NOW was the time for a baby too.  We are going through some changes at work, so I’ll have more flexibility and different opportunities and it was just the right time for us.

So ya, I’m totally not joking about this.

It’s funny, I don’t mind sharing here that I’m trying but guess what? There are family members on facebook I WON’T share this with.  Of course 90% of the people on FB don’t know about this blog either. And I know one family member who, when she finds out I’m pregnant, will be PISSED at me. She already doesn’t talk to me… And this might be the end for us.  I’m really sad about that.  Because I love her.  And she’d be in my top 5 of women I’d want in the delivery room with me.

I had a C-section with Emma.  After a NOT FUN labor (ha ha, oxymoron, I know). I don’t regret the c-section, I wanted to be alive to hold my baby and I wanted my baby alive.  I found out yesterday that the drug they used to induce me is  NOT RECOMMENDED for induction of a “live baby”.  And now that I’m doing some research, I’ve come to the conclusion that perhaps my LABOR was grossly mismanaged and I’m ANGRY about that.  I read the books, I wrote the birth plan (laugh, birth plan?) and it just sucks sweaty goat balls.

Nothing to be done about it now, but?

In other news it’s snowing.  And I’m not kidding about that either.